On OCs
by Manic Pixie
Summary: First fic - left up for sentimental purposes.


**Jet:** Remind me why we're doing this AGAIN.

**Zuko:** Because if we DON'T, fangirls will kidnap us in our sleep.

**Jet:** Right. So, what's for today?

**Sokka:** Roll camera.

**Jet:** (looks confused) We're talking about cameras?

**Zuko:** (whacks Jet) No, you idiot! He wants to get our reaction to whatever we ARE talking about on camera!

**Jet:** (look of dawning comprehension) That would make a lot more sense. So, what're we talking about?

**Suki**** and ****Katara****:** OCs.

**Zuko:** What does OC even stand for?

**Jet:** (incredulously) You've got a sister who's an OC, and you don't even KNOW?!

**Zuko:** Well, no. I don't.

**Jet:** Even I know!

**Zuko:** Well, you're dating one and know four others!

**Jet:** Still. The one who told me is your sister!

**Zuko: **And you're a lot more familiar with her mouth than I am!

**Suki: **Okay, TMI. Waaaayyy TMI.

**Jet:** TMI? What does THAT mean?

**Zuko:** And you think **I'm** stupid because I didn't know what OC means?!

**Jet:** Kinda, yeah.

**Suki:** (facepalm) Do you nitwits WANT me to get brain damage?!

**Katara:** Think of what Amena goes through.

**Suki:** Amena?

**Sokka:** She's the OC they're arguing about. She's Zuko's half-sister AND Jet's girlfriend.

**Suki: **How does she manage that?

**Amena:** With great difficulty.

**Suki: **Wait, who are you and when did you get here?

**Amena:** Oh, I'm Amena. Nice to meet you.

**Suki:** When did you get here?

**Amena:** Just now.

**Suki:** Okay then. Seriously though. Jet and Zuko just talking are one kind of trouble, but I don't see how you manage both all the time.

**Amena:** Easy. Jet I can bribe or threaten. Zuko I can blackmail.

**Suki:** But aren't you a firebender? I mean, you ARE Zuko's sister.

**Amena:** Yeah, I am. So what?

**Suki:** Jet HATES firebenders.

**Jet: **Thanks for stating the obvious, Suki. Oh, hey Amena.

**Amena:** Hey Jet. And yeah, he does, but I could calm him down right after he found out, and now he's just used to it.

**Suki:** Really? How do you calm Jet down?

**Amena:** I'm afraid that there are only two ways known to man: to use energybending to manipulate his emotions, or to bribe him into calming down. The first no longer works, and the second only works with me.

**Zuko:** Trust me, the second isn't one you want to find out about.

**Suki:** Oh? What is it?

**Zuko:** I'm not saying.

**Suki:** Why no- Oh. OOHH. I think I understand. How often do they --"

**Amena:** (shrugs) Pretty much every night, except when we've been in an argument or something.

**Suki:** And how often are you in arguments?

**Zuko:** Most of the time.

**Amena:** But it's only the REALLY bad ones that stop us from-

**Suki:** I GOT IT! Really, you don't need to go any farther. What makes a really bad one?

**Jet:** Every argument that qualifies as REALLY bad involves several things. First, I do something she thinks is stupid.

**Amena:** I don't THINK it's stupid. I KNOW it's stupid.

**Jet:** We'll argue about that later. Second, we get in a fight that usually becomes violent.

**Amena:** Usually meaning always.

**Jet:** I'm telling them what happens! Third, after we're tired and hurt, we collapse. Usually she falls on top of me.

**Amena: **I don't fall, I crawl over and use him as a pillow. He's quite comfortable, actually.

**Jet:** And by the next morning, we've completely forgotten what we were arguing about.

_(silence for a few moments)_

**Suki:** Really?

**Amena:** Yeah, pretty much.

**Suki:** That's not healthy!

**Amena:** Not really, no.

**Katara: **That's more than I ever wanted to know about you, Jet.

**Jet:** Well, it's not like you and Zuko are much better. I mean, you two do pretty much the same thing.

**Sokka:** WHAT?!

**Amena and Suki: **Cue overprotective older brother.

**Sokka:** What do you does Zuko do to you?!

**Zuko and Katara:** Nothing!

**Sokka:** You're lying!

Amena: Technically, they're not.

**Sokka:** 'Technically'? What does **that** mean?!

**Amena:** Zuko doesn't do anything **to** Katara...

**Jet:** (finishing Amena's sentence) ...he does things **WITH** Katara.

**Zuko:** Not helping!

**Jet: **Not trying!

**Zuko:** Sokka, it's not that big a deal!

**Sokka:** Yes it is!

**Katara:** No, it's not.

**Sokka:** Katara, stay out of this! It doesn't concern you, it's only about...you.

**Suki:** That makes no sense whatsoever.

_**Meanwhile, in Omashu...**_

**Aang****:** They do know this is live, right?

**On Ji:** I think they've forgotten.

**Longshot:** ...

**Smellerbee: **Yeah, you're right.

**On Ji:** What did he say?

**Smellerbee:** Amena hasn't forgotten.

**Aang:** How do you do that?

**Smellerbee:** Do what?

**Aang:** Read Longshot like that.

**Smellerbee:** With ease. Now shush, things are getting interesting.

_**Back at the studio...**_

**Sokka:** I cannot believe you slept with my sister!

**Katara:** For the millionth time, we weren't like THAT! We were just tired and fell asleep!

**Sokka:** A likely story.

**Katara:** It's true! Zuko said it himself, and you know how terrible a liar he is!

**Zuko:** Hey!

**Katara:** Well, it's true!

**Amena:** (sighs) Well, this has gotten boring. Sokka, I suggest you build a bridge and get over it.

**Sokka: **Why?

**Amena: **If you DON'T, I'll lock you in a room and give you food, but not meat, for a month.

**Sokka: **(look of horror) You wouldn't.

**Jet: **Yes, yes she would.

**Amena: **Jet, you and Zuko get back on topic.

**Jet:** Why?

**Amena:** If you DON'T, you don't get any for a month.

**Jet:** That's just cruel.

**Amena:** Yup.

**Jet:** Do I get a reward if I get everyone back on topic?

**Amena:** If you manage to do that, then sure.

(Amena leaves)

**Jet: **(pumps fist in air) YES!

**Suki:** (buries her face in her hands) Spirits I hope no little kids are watching this.

**Jet:** Do Pipsqueak and The Duke count?

**Suki:** I'm not worried about them. I'm sure they've heard all this before.

**Jet:** Probably, yeah. So, what WAS the subject anyway?

_(Crickets chirp in the background)_

**Zuko:** No one remembers?

**Jet:** Well, if no one remembers, I'm leaving. Amena owes me...

**Zuko:** That's right! We were talking about OCs!

**Jet:** Damn you, firebender.

**Zuko:** Whatever.

**Jet:** Can we just skip to the part where we start fighting? I need to collect my dues from your sister.

**Zuko:** Sounds like a plan.

_(Jet and Zuko start fighting; random fangirls start cheering; camera fades)_

_**Later, at Zuko's hotel room...**_

**Sokka:** Hey Zuko. I just wanted to apolo-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY SISTER?!

**A/N: Just somethin' cracky I wrote in my spare time that one of my friends convinced me to publish. Constructive criticism and praise are welcomed. **


End file.
